Tuesday 12 February 2013

Chronically ill emotions - FEAR

Today I'm going to talk about emotions that you get if you are chronically ill. Now, i have spoken a bit about this before, one of my first posts was about Guilt and that was written nearly a year ago so i figured it was time to cover some others.

If there is one thing I do not want to hear from you, it is that this illness only exists in my head!

Some seem to think that if only I would do this or that, think this way or not that way I wouldn't be sick.

It would be nice if it was as simple as that but its not. These illnesses are very real and very physical.

Unfortunately there is not enough research and probably not of the right type going on yet. Everyone is looking for a magic cure, typically a pill. With these illnesses it is most likely a combination of things that causes them and a combination of things needed to get better but first we really need a diagnostic test to test for ME, etc.

Most researchers are looking at environment toxins and viruses as being the causes of our symptoms. These illness do affect the brain. Studies have shown abnormality in such things as blood flow, inflammation and biochemical balances and glands (wow i sounded grown up then!)

But, anyway, onto the emotional aspects of dealing with chronic illness, particular chronic illnesses that the general public and the media has not accepted as real or physical yet. Some of these emotional reactions are directly caused by chemical and other exposures and some are from living day to day with the illnesses.

First let's start with FEAR [Sorry, this could be a long post, or maybe I'll do it in a few parts?] While not a lot of people want to talk about it this is something that a lot of people experience. And I feel like a lot of people feel that they have to be brave or strong, that they are not allowed to be scared or frightened. A lot of these illnesses are often slow in being diagnosed and symptoms are so varied, so weird and often mimic other serious illnesses. Its hard to imagine you can be this sick and not die, especially if you have been very healthy and active before or if the illness has come on suddenly.

There is fear of always being in pain and that you won't be able to handle it or cope. There is also fears of rejection and loneliness; Fear is not fun to deal with!

Its easy to be afraid of so many things when you're ill (I'm afraid all the time). Sometimes it feels like the world itself is attacking you. In some ways becoming ill is like having entered a new land, full of enemies and things that are evil and against you! (Symptoms and even doctors! etc.)

It's scary to have to go through different things. Staying in hospitals and having tests etc. I guess it depends on the person but some people have to face their biggest fears, being ill. A girl I know, I absolutely terrified of needles and since getting sick, she has to have blood tests etc a LOT more which is very scary for her because thst is HER fear. It's different for everybody but being ill is definitely scary.

Part #2 coming soon! Hope you enjoyed! Don't forget to subscribe and leave me a comment!

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